It's been one month and eight days since we heard the disgusting word "malignant". Even knowing what the word meant I had to confirm with my mother that it meant cancer. October 13, 2012 will be forever etched in my brain. It was a gloomy, drizzly Saturday. After hearing the doctor say it as a matter of factually, a fit of sadness and rage filled within me. I couldn't believe this was all happening, AGAIN! My only sister, my little sister, who is only 25, was given the sentence of Leukemia. I had lost my mother-in-law to Acute Myeloid Leukemia 3 months prior. As I looked out the doctor's office window, I saw my father-in-law's car in the staff parking lot of the hospital, and all I could think was to run down to him because he would know how I was feeling. The emotions that rush through a person when they hear what we heard is unthinkable. "It should be me..I've polluted my body way more than her through my years!" I kept saying out loud.
My brave sister just sat there, taking in all the doctor had to say. Me on other hand, was cursing cancer quietly under my breath. My mom and dad cried quietly, and my brother-in-law sat next to my sister stone faced. "This is fucking stupid!", I kept saying to myself. FUCK CANCER! The doctor told us this wasn't going to be a sprint, but a marathon. Being a veteran marathon runner I thought to myself, do you know how hard a fucking marathon is, pal?!
After the doctor told us that Vanessa would be moved to Froedert Memorial Hospital, and further testing would go on there to determine the type of Leukemia she had, we all quietly got up out of our seats and left. In the abandoned looking waiting area, which would be populated with various patients any other week day, the five us just held each other and cried. I remember feeling that all I wanted to was run, run until my body said stop.
After leaving the hospital we gathered at my sister's house to try to begin to wrap our heads around the blow that was just given to us. Personally, I felt like my sister was given a death sentence. Leukemia in my mind eats people up and spits them out. I don't want her die! She is my little sister! She is starting her life journey! For Christ's sake she was only married two years ago, she and her husband had just closed on their first house together a month prior to October 13th, and she started a great job 6 months ago. Why was God doing this to us?
Vanessa had received many floral arrangements from her short stay at KMH. I knew from my mother-in-law's bout with this stupid disease that flowers were no good. I immediately told everyone get these flowers out of her house, they are bad for her! Live plants and flowers have bacteria, and not knowing exactly where Vanessa's blood counts were scared me. So my mom and I packed up the flowers and plants in my car and drove them to my house. Once my mom and I unloaded all the flowers and plants I told her to take my car back to Vanessa's without me. I needed to run this out. And so I ran, I ran has hard and as fast as I could for the 4.5-5 miles it was from my house to hers. This marathon was only beginning.....
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